Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Growing Pains



I was lucky enough to score this book on my Friends of the Library book shelf sale for a $1.oo today. It has a huge waiting list on all the booktrading sites and at the library.I liked the Twilight series a lot so I am going to read this one soon.I haven't read Breaking Dawn yet but I have it on hold at the library when a copy becomes available.She writes mostly for the teen market but she has a vast following of adult readers too.I think the library gods showed me favor today.LOL.
Do you ever feel like you have adult growing pains? I do .I think we never stop growing as people. I know that I feel sometime when I am in a difficult circumstance that maybe the universe (aka god) doesn't like me so much . I rationalize that if the universe loved me that I would have it easier and have better circumstances. I know that most of us have felt this way at some point.
I have come to accept that in the difficult times is when I gain the most wisdom and understanding and it is in these times that I learn and grow the most and maybe that is what they are there to teach me.I think of these times as a Stern Parent that is trying to teach me that it is these times of difficulty and stretching that I learn that life isn't fair, good people have bad things happen to them and that feeling sorry for myself isn't helpful.
I watched Randy Pausch's wife in an interview a couple of weeks back and she said something that really stuck with me .She said that when she would start to dwell on the what ifs and the inevitable and she could feel herself cycling out of control with worry she would repeat a mantra to herself and she would tell herself ,"Not helpful". I have been doing this and it really works a lot for me .
I have chosen to believe that these " Growing Pains" will hopefully lead me into a new chapter of my life that is new and different.I also know that this time of life is excellent to reveal the areas of my life that may need some exploration and revision such as unresolved conflicts , unhealthly lifestyles and behaviors.
What areas of your life are you experiencing " Growing Pains" in?
Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish." -Ovid

23 comments:

Strider said...

Thought provoking post. I have thought about why things happen to people, life's not fair, etc. And I have come to the conclusion that has satisfied me. If you can lift up your eyes and see eternity, then this tempory state we are in doesn't really matter. Enjoy the good days, endure the bad, and know that there is an adventurous life after this one.

Adrienne said...

Hi Yolanda -
I love our Friends of the Library sale room. I find a lot of neat things there when I slow down enough to stop by there. Enjoy your book. It's fun to find one you want to read and a bargain too!
~Adrienne~

Amy Ellen said...

Adult growing pains yup I know what your talking about. Thank you for the timely post. I have been going through some stuff!!
Thanks
Amy

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Yolanda - First, thanks for visiting my site. More importantly, I absolutely agree with your thoughts on growing pains. I continue to be baffled at how so many "tests" can be thrown a person's way as they grow older. And by "a person" I mean ME. I started my blog as a diversion from reality, and it continues to be that, but my goodness if I focused on all the negative stuff I'd be in an insane asylum! (I still might be destined for that, but I'm fighting it.)

Anyway, as you have stated, the trick is in catching yourself going negative and then forcing yourself in the other direction. That's easier said than done, but that's the secret. Turn the negative into good, and good will follow.

(At least I hope so.)

Thanks again. - cbw

SandyCarlson said...

Adult growing pains--most definitely.

Carver said...

I liked this post a lot. I definitely have had and continue to have growing pains as an adult. I was 40 before I stopped wondering what I'd be when I grew up. At 50, I have finally reached the point where I'm not worried about some line in the sand where I'm grown up. It's a lifelong process.

Tess Kincaid said...

I love my "Friends of the Library" sales and also my library discard shelf. Some of my favorite books have been discovered there. Wonderful Ovid quote...I'm writing it down.

Thanks for stopping over at my place today! Hope to see you again soon.

The Urban Chic said...

Yolanda, please send me a list of some books you might like to read and what crafts you do. I want to get my RAKs out before the year is up. I am getting back to my old self. Hubby bought me Pausch's book and going to take a lazy day off to read it next week. I want to finish my projects before I start anything else. Thanks for coming by. Your name has been added to the list. If you should win and can't use any of it, gift it to someone else. I am hoping to get to Vancouver, Wa soon and go back to Cannon Beach. I can use some cool weather right now. Hugs, Pat

The Urban Chic said...

Forgot to mention-love your article about growing pains. I have some great ones going on right now and for the good of me and others around me. Hugs, Pat

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

Good evening. Thank you for visiting my blog.

I enjoyed this post a lot. I think "adult growing pains" is an insightful turn of phrase.

And I'm so glad you posted that bit about the "Not helpful" mantra. I had someone say something harsh to me yesterday, and I've been picking at myself all day about it. Now, if the negative thoughts come back, I'll try saying "Not helpful." thanks.

Relyn Lawson said...

I gotta love a girl who quotes Ovid. And one who has Stephanie Meyers in the same post with Ovid? Oh yeah! Thanks for stopping by my blog. I've loved getting to read yours.

Brenda said...

I pray that I never stop growing,,,well, there are a couple of areas that a little stunting wouldn't hurt.

Wonderfully written post!

Shelby said...

very interesting.. I absolutely love finding new books.. a b s o l u t e l y!

Hope your week's goin' good.. my time has been consumed with kids and summer and work (lotsa work). I'll try to blog more.

I got in a funk.. and didn't know what to write about.

Sometimes I feel so empty..not empty of life and stuff.. just empty of things to share with others who might not think it interesting.. sigh.

Glad you're here to blog with.

Anonymous said...

yolanda thanks so much for your visit over at my blog today. and another oregonian..i love that! i have had growing pains all my life. the ones i have at my age now are far less painful than the ones i had when young. now at least i know things pass and that i can't control much of anything in this world but my viewpoint. and that is a relief and very powerful.
thanks for making me think about this.

Anonymous said...

I like you blog...you have so many thought provoking posts.
I have heard so much about this series that I now must read the books. Growing pains never stop...they get more interesting the older you get...and easier.
Thank you for your visit.

storyteller said...

Lucky you indeed! I’ve heard of but not read this series … thinking about picking it up when time permits but don’t know when that’s likely to be at this point. My ‘growing pains’ seem to be around ‘letting go’ of things I don’t want or need … but feel ‘attached’ to emotionally.
Hugs and blessings,

Sharon Lynne said...

I, too, am growing, and this stre-t-c-hing is hurting.

My weak area, is entrusting my son into the arms of God. A God I cannot see!

Today my mantra was on God's attributes. "God is merciful. God is faithful. God is just."

I like your mantra too! I will remind myself that worrying is "not helpful". Thanks for sharing this with us!!

JBelle said...

hi Yolanda, I loved this post and LOVED the Ovid piece. I am currently cleaning my library and giving it a serious prune. I carried about 7 boxes of books last night! I am going to have a garage sale soon; think I'll take the proceeds from the books and give them to the public library here. I can't imagine how old I'll be before I don't have growing pains. I am so conscious that it really is as simple as what I tell my kids: making good choices. I know what's healthy for me and is a good choice for me; why do I turn away from the light? I do. I have friends who help me do that, too. Looking back, it all seems to seductive and so complicated. It's really not :)

Joni said...

adult growing pains are very real...right now in my life I am stretching, learning, to get outside my comfort zone, to think outside the box and while trying to maintain a positve approach to my daily undertakings have found it to be unbelievably rewarding and eye opening....difficult times are all relative to our own expectations...kind of like that old saying "I complained about the pain in my legs until I met a man with no legs"...we just have to accept what we are given, filter everything and keep what makes us a better person or at least leave our space on this earth a little better than how we found it....rest assured you are loved in all of your wisdom and through all of your difficult times.

Angela Marie said...

Wow! I could really relate.

"The Lord sometimes takes us into troubled waters NOT to drown us, but to cleanse us."

I have to remind myself of this whenever I start feeling like that.

Hugs
:)

Mental P Mama said...

I was on the Board of the Friends of our Library. Good for you. And I am still on the fence about her books. Should I?

His Girl Friday said...

great post, and yes, thought provoking, thanks, Y :)

Karen said...

That's really useful advise, stopping spiralling negativity with "Not Helpful"--I'm going to try that today.

I'm feeling the growing pains, too--things changing, me changing, people I love changing--trying to integrate everything and thrive...so hard, so worth it...