Friday, April 21, 2006

Mixed Emotions:

I will be going later today to my dad's old house that we are attempting to clean andseel after his death. It was my home for 18 years but now it just feels me with dread to go back. He let a woman live with him who took advantage of him (despite all my attempts to persuade him otherwise) and she took all his money and destroyed the house by keeping 20 dogs in it.So all I am left with now is bad memories , and a mess. I loved him but I still feel much anger with him for what he did.Also I have such hate for the woman who claims she is a good christian but used his money and took advantage of him for her drug use and to but stuff on his credit cards. I so want to get rid of this anger toward him and her that I feel . I know it isn't good for me. I think mainly it is just that what he did hurt me so bad. It is as though he cared more for her than his on children.Yet who took care of him after she left?
On a much lighter topic:
I am hoping to begin preparing for our future move. I am so ready for a change of place. I so want to live closer to the ocean.
I am trying to Simply my life and get rid of my excess baggage.
Here is a new blog I found I like: Ink on my fingers go and check it out she really has a gift with words.

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