This wonderful video is from a blog I love from Ann Voskamp and it is called A Holy Experience.It speaks so much in this video to my Philosophy of Life,my messy perfectly imperfect life.
One of the things that I wanted to do this year with the word Nurture was to begin to Nurture my faith which for about the last ten years has been in a dormancy of sorts so much so that at times I wondered if it was still there but yes it was and still is there and I can feel stirrings in my heart and soul of its rebirth.
I grew up in a family that believed in God but never attended church and with a dad who made fun of me when I attended church on my own and even on the day I was baptized no one from my family was there to see. In the intervening years since I have alternately been active in church and not. In the last ten years I lost my mom,dad and a pregnancy that I had tried all my adult life to have and dealt with moving cross country and very difficult. financial circumstances.I often questioned Why and felt I didn't receive an answer but I think now that a lot of the reason that all this happened is that now I feel that I can identify with so many people who hurt and feel alone and lonely and feel like their heavenly father has abandoned them.
I know that now where I am in my life my faith means more to me now that is beginning to flower again from the dry desert floor of the past decade because it has been tested through the fires of life and survived it all to become stronger.
I know some of you who have read this blog for awhile remember me posting about an event that happened right after I moved here .There was a local blogger who put on her blog that she wanted friends and felt alone so I sent her an email and told her that I would love to be her friend. She wrote me back an email that said after reading my blog she didn't want to be friends with a southerner who was a religious fanatic and a bigot and not open minded. I went back and read my blog and couldn't see what she saw but in a round about way she helped me more than she ever knew because she made me see that the kernel of my faith was still there and that I was okay with that.
So here I am once again a believer who is going to take this year to Nurture my faith. I hope you will come along as I discover things about the walk of faith and myself in this messy thrilling thing we call life.
"Don't be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today...the Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm." (Exodus 14:13-14, NLT)